{"id":9298,"date":"2019-09-26T13:48:10","date_gmt":"2019-09-26T18:48:10","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/unitedresourceconnection.org\/cannon-ball-nd-58528\/two-spirit-woman-overcoming-trauma\/"},"modified":"2019-09-26T13:48:11","modified_gmt":"2019-09-26T18:48:11","slug":"two-spirit-woman-overcoming-trauma","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/unitedresourceconnection.org\/cannon-ball-nd-58528\/two-spirit-woman-overcoming-trauma\/","title":{"rendered":"Two-Spirit woman: Overcoming trauma"},"content":{"rendered":"
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As a two-spirit woman, Carla Douglas has survived trauma and experiences that many people will not have to go through in their lifetime. She has overcome these challenges to become a needed resource in Rapid City. Photo by: Richie Richards<\/p>\n<\/div>\n

RAPID CITY \u2014 When Carla Douglas, 54, was born, her mother wanted a daughter so badly she named the young child, Carla Georgina and began dressing her in girl\u2019s clothing.
\nDouglas is a First Nations woman born and raised in British Columbia, Canada. Off and on for the last thirty years, she has called Rapid City home. She is currently volunteering with several organizations in the Black Hills town, including Rapid City Community Conversations and One Rapid City.
\nShe brings her experience, background and education to the table of any discussion which may include topics such as discrimination and crisis intervention. Douglas is active in these discussions because she is a survivor herself.
\nWhen she was born, her mother was incarcerated and had \u201cwanted a girl\u201d. She dressed Carla in girl\u2019s clothing and this was how it was.
\nDuring the early stages of her life, Douglas remembers the random beatings she endured in the middle of the night from a mother who was an alcoholic. These beatings would occur for trivial reasons; over chores that were not done, or for getting her clothes dirty. Douglas learned early on to pretend to be sleeping, so she could be prepared to defend herself should her mom come in her room after a night of drinking.
\nDuring these late night beatings, Douglas said she developed a comforting relationship with pain. At age 5, she made her first of many attempts at suicide. One day, she went into the bathroom and took all of the pills in the medicine cabinet. She survived because her body rejected the pills and she \u201cthrew them back up\u201d.
\nThe young girl said she was taken advantage of sexually many times by family members and persons in the homes where her mom would leave her.
\nAt the age of 6, Douglas was made to go to a mission boarding school in British Columbia. When she entered the school, she came in with both a boy\u2019s and a girl\u2019s uniform, but she felt most comfortable wearing the uniform which matched her gender \u2013 girl. She said children her age didn\u2019t know what to think of her, so they didn\u2019t pick on her as much as the older children. \u201cThe ones near my age didn\u2019t get it. They weren\u2019t the bullies. They didn\u2019t know how to act around me. I looked queer to them, strange,\u201d she said. \u201cWhen they heard to older ones make fun of me, they didn\u2019t understand that either. All of us \u2018boys\u2019 had to be in one dorm and I didn\u2019t fit in.\u201d
\nThe bullying did not stop with the children. Douglas says it was the priests and nuns who would yell and shout at her which inspired the children to do the same. The priests and nuns would refer to her as being evil, or a heathen. \u201cI was called an abomination. I was called a devil\u2019s child. I could not conform to their ideology of being a boy,\u201d she said.
\nWhile at the boarding school, Douglas recalls a priest who had gained interest in the girl. She said the man had taken her under his wing and he had become a place of comfort for her. He took favor to her and gave her special treatment. That was until one day when he called her into a room, alone.
\n\u201cThere was a father there, that when I first got to boarding school, he started to be nice to me. He showed me a little bit of affection,\u201d she said. This was at a time when Douglas was being harassed and bullied on a daily basis. \u201cHe made me feel safe. He used to give me a treat.\u201d
\n\u201cOne night he called for me and he told me that this was a time that we were going to pray. When I started praying, I was saying Our Fathers (prayers), I was doing the Virgin Mary (prayer). There was another prayer I had to recite, and as I was doing this he started to\u2026\u201d Douglas said. This was the first of several incidents in which she was sexually abused at the boarding school by men of the cloth.
\nAt this point, Douglas had been emotionally abused, mentally abused, physically abused, sexually abused and now spiritual abuse had entered her life. She was not yet 8 years old.
\nFollowing her boarding school experience, Douglas had gone to the public school. She said Canadian law had made First Nations children go to boarding school from ages 6-8, before they could attend public school. The school was located 25 miles from her home. The teachers and staff of the public school were made aware of the fact that she \u201cwas a girl\u201d before she arrived.
\n\u201cI\u2019m a girl, but I was born with male genitalia,\u201d she said. \u201cAt first it was OK, they all knew I looked kind of odd to them. I would play with girls and I wore blouses to school.\u201d
\nThe trauma of riding the bus each day for 50 miles to and from school was traumatic. During the bus rides, students would not allow her to sit by them. She said bullies would spit on her and punch her as she walked down the aisle of the bus.
\nUp until this point, Douglas said her stepfather had tried to bond with her through traditionally male-gendered activities. He wanted her to be a son-figure in his life, but while he was away truck driving, Douglas could be her mom\u2019s daughter. This threw the young girl\u2019s self-identity yearning to find itself. When she got into middle school, the bullying and teasing went to another level for Douglas. It was during this time when her mother and stepfather had separated.
\nDouglas had gone to live with her stepfather but was eventually returned to her mother\u2019s custody as the stepfather was unable to care for the children. At the age of 11, Douglas said her mom began to sex traffic her. It was during a night when she was pretending to be asleep that a man came into her bedroom said her mother had sent him there to make her a woman. The mother was exchanging money, alcohol and household items for sex with the pre-teen. This happened from the ages of 11-13.
\nEventually, Douglas had run away from home for a time and had gone to live with her grandfather. Before living with her grandfather, Douglas had lived in a camp just outside of town. He was good to Douglas and kept a home for her through high school.
\nThe bullying continued and children kept harassing her for being who she was. It was things like gym class which caused stress and traumatic experiences. Boys dressed in their locker room and the girls dressed in their locker room. Douglas dressed in a bathroom stall located in the gym. One day, a group of boys entered into the bathroom and began to harass her for being in women\u2019s underclothes (bra and panties). This is when she says the boys had gang raped her.
\nLiving through these things for Douglas has been traumatic. She has lived her 54 years as a female. Men and women have taken advantage of her for most of her life. Becoming an adult kept her living in the life that she was raised in. She had turned to prostitution on occasion for survival. She eventually had gone to college and received her degree.
\nLast year, Douglas\u2019 wife of 30 years had passed away. The year since has been hard on her, but she continues to help others. She is active in the Rapid City community. She brings experience and depth to any conversation and a sense of healing to the community.
\nDouglas now heads Douglas Mental Health Services and specializes in LGBT\/transgender, suicide, sexual abuse, sex trafficking, crisis intervention and grief\/bereavement. She can be contacted at douglasmentalhealth2019@gmail.com<\/a>.<\/p>\n

(Contact Richie Richards at richie4175@gmail.com<\/a>)<\/p>\n

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As a two-spirit woman, Carla Douglas has survived trauma and experiences that many people will not have to go through in their lifetime. She has overcome these challenges to become a needed resource in Rapid City. Photo by: Richie Richards RAPID CITY \u2014 When Carla Douglas, 54, was born, her <\/p>\n

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