{"id":7560,"date":"2018-04-08T09:00:00","date_gmt":"2018-04-08T14:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/unitedresourceconnection.org\/goodyear-village-az-cdp\/the-damaging-beliefs-of-bipolar-disorder\/"},"modified":"2018-06-27T12:24:50","modified_gmt":"2018-06-27T17:24:50","slug":"the-damaging-beliefs-of-bipolar-disorder","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/unitedresourceconnection.org\/goodyear-village-az-cdp\/the-damaging-beliefs-of-bipolar-disorder\/","title":{"rendered":"The Damaging Beliefs of Bipolar Disorder"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"Lessons<\/a>When writer Elaina J. Martin was diagnosed with bipolar disorder, she felt \u201cless than.\u201d \u201cI felt like other people were better than me, less damaged than I was.\u201d<\/p>\n

In the first few years of her diagnosis, psychotherapist Colleen King, LMFT, worried she\u2019d never be able to function at a higher level. \u201cDuring those years of struggle, I saw myself deteriorate, become less capable, and felt like a failure in many ways.\u201d<\/p>\n

Bipolar disorder is a difficult illness that can shatter one\u2019s self-worth and sense of self.<\/p>\n

Beliefs tend to differ in different people, depending on the person\u2019s circumstances. But largely, psychotherapist Sheri Van Dijk sees two themes. One theme centers around \u201cI\u2019m not good enough\u201d: \u201cI can\u2019t work, so I\u2019m not good enough\u201d; \u201cI\u2019m crazy\u201d; \u201cI should be able to manage emotions the way others do\u201d; \u201cI\u2019m a burden to my family\u201d; \u201cI\u2019m a bad partner\u201d; \u201cI don\u2019t deserve my partner\u201d; \u201cI\u2019ll never have a relationship\u201d; \u201cno one likes me\u201d; \u201cI\u2019m a leach\u201d (a client\u2019s exact words).<\/p>\n

The second theme is even more insidious: Individuals with bipolar disorder may internalize society\u2019s disparaging beliefs about mental illness, Van Dijk said. They start believing: \u201cI have to hide my bipolar disorder\u201d; \u201cif people knew I had bipolar disorder, they wouldn\u2019t accept me, and they\u2019d treat me differently.\u201d<\/p>\n

These self-judgments are especially prevalent during depressive episodes. This is when Martin has beliefs that she\u2019s ugly and useless. \u201cI feel like I don\u2019t deserve anything good in my life, that I am not worthy of anything like love or friendship,\u201d said Martin, who pens the blog Being Beautifully Bipolar<\/a> and has written a memoir called There Comes a Light: A Memoir of Mental Illness<\/em>, which comes out in late spring. Sometimes, she feels \u201csoul-sucking emptiness.\u201d<\/p>\n

Self-judgments also are common in mixed episodes when \u201can individual is experiencing symptoms of both depression and hypomania or mania at the same time, so there\u2019s lots of energy, but the person experiences depressed mood,\u201d said Van Dijk, the author of several books, including the Dialectical Behavior Therapy Skills Workbook for Bipolar Disorder<\/a><\/em>.<\/p>\n

When the manic or hypomanic episode is over, people often crash. They bash themselves for their behavior during the episode, she said. For instance, maybe they went on a shopping spree. Maybe they went gambling. And they interpret this behavior as evidence of their awfulness.<\/p>\n

Individuals may start to distrust themselves because they don\u2019t know when an episode will disrupt their lives, said King<\/a>, who specializes in treating individuals with bipolar disorder, depression and anxiety. This distrust may amplify anxiety and poor self-worth, and lead people to stop setting goals, she said. \u201cThey come to believe they are no longer capable of achieving them, and may not even try anymore.\u201d<\/p>\n

It\u2019s important to work through these kinds of negative beliefs with your therapist. Below are additional tips you can try:
\n
\nReframe your judgments.<\/strong> When helping her clients navigate self-judgments, Van Dijk<\/a> turns to the DBT skills of Nonjudgmental Stance and Radical Acceptance (more on that below). She has clients write out their self-judgments, and pick one theme to start exploring. Then they write out nonjudgmental statements as a way to reply to their judgmental thought.<\/p>\n

She shared this example: You write down \u201cI\u2019m a leach.\u201d Next, you ask yourself: What does this statement really mean to me? What emotions am I experiencing that are causing me to have this judgment?<\/p>\n

According to Van Dijk, you might write down: \u201cI\u2019m living in my father\u2019s basement and am on disability because I have bipolar disorder and can\u2019t work right now, and I\u2019m disappointed in myself for this.\u201d \u201cThe fact that I can\u2019t work and contribute to society makes me feel hopeless.\u201d \u201cI think that people judge me because I have bipolar disorder and can\u2019t work, and I feel ashamed.\u201d \u201cI think I should be able to work and I\u2019m frustrated that I haven\u2019t been able to keep a job.\u201d<\/p>\n

Then you read these neutral, nonjudgmental statements to help you change your self-talk. \u201c[N]onjudgments\u2026don\u2019t take the emotional pain away, but they prevent us from triggering extra emotional pain.\u201d When you use the word \u201cleach\u201d to define yourself, you feel even worse. When you stick to the facts of the situation and your original emotions, you still feel upset, but you\u2019re not causing yourself more pain, she said.<\/p>\n

Practice radical acceptance. <\/strong>This DBT skill is about acknowledging your reality. I have bipolar disorder. I\u2019m unable to work right now. I\u2019m currently living with my parents.<\/em> This, too, doesn\u2019t make the pain go away\u2014you\u2019ll still feel sadness or disappointment\u2014but it doesn\u2019t cause more emotional suffering, Van Dijk said.<\/p>\n

\u201c[W]hen we stop fighting and judging the reality\u2014\u201cIt\u2019s not fair, it shouldn\u2019t be this way, why me?\u201d\u2014and accept reality as it is\u2014\u201cI have bipolar disorder. Period\u201d\u2014the anger emotions dissipate and disappear.\u201d
\n
\nShift your perspective. <\/strong>It also can help to take on a different perspective. \u201cImagine your mother, best friend, brother, etc. is talking to themselves the way you\u2019re talking to yourself; what would you say to that person?\u201d Van Dijk said. Try to have compassion for yourself.<\/p>\n

Ask for feedback. <\/strong>King suggested asking people you trust to share how they see and experience you. \u201cSometimes we may see ourselves as less capable than others see us, so having a reality check from others can help to change those negative beliefs.\u201d<\/p>\n

Seek out inspiring resources. <\/strong>King suggested listening to podcasts and reading writing that is inspirational to you. For instance, check out Psych Central\u2019s newest weekly podcast: \u201cA Bipolar, A Schizophrenic and a Podcast<\/a>.\u201d Check out memoirs and blogs on bipolar disorder.<\/p>\n

Acknowledge your hard work. <\/strong>When you\u2019re feeling good, come up with positive statements and achievements; paint them, jot down them down or create a collage, King said. You also can list all the positive things you\u2019ve accomplished that day or week\u2014from showering to making phone calls to going to work, she said. Recognize that bipolar disorder is a challenging condition, and you\u2019re doing an incredible job.<\/p>\n

When Martin is besieged by negative thoughts, several things help: \u201cI have come to learn that every day is a new day and with it will be changes and different moods that I cannot control. I have also learned that I have a mental illness, a chemical imbalance in my brain, that makes me\u2026sometimes act the way I act.\u201d<\/p>\n

King challenges her negative beliefs by talking to loved ones or colleagues, using cognitive-behavioral techniques, listening to encouraging guided meditations, reading inspirational authors and exercising. She\u2019s also worked hard to attain stability with medication, therapy and lifestyle changes.<\/p>\n

Ultimately, it\u2019s important to remind yourself that depression lies. As King said, depression \u201ctells you that you\u2019ll \u2018never\u2019 feel better or be \u2018good enough\u2019 to complete a task or bigger goal.\u201d<\/p>\n

But you will. With treatment and hard work, you will feel better. You will realize that you are very much good enough\u2014whatever your personal or professional situation. Because that\u2019s the truth.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

<\/span><\/div>

Visit Original Source<\/a><\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

When writer Elaina J. Martin was diagnosed with bipolar disorder, she felt \u201cless than.\u201d \u201cI felt like other people were better than me, less damaged than I was.\u201d In the first few years of her diagnosis, psychotherapist Colleen King, LMFT, worried she\u2019d never be able to function at a higher <\/p>\n

Read More<\/a>
Shared by Margarita Tartakovsky, M.S., Contributing Blogger<\/a> April 8, 2018<\/p>\n

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