To delve deeper, Dobbin suggested jotting down your responses to these questions:<\/p>\n
- \n
- \u201cWhat am I feeling?\u201d (You might jot down angry, sad, or hopeless.)<\/li>\n
- \u201cWhat am I thinking?\u201d (\u201cThoughts are sentences in our mind: \u2018I hate that my job is so demanding\u2019; \u2018I never seem to get any time to myself.\u2019\u201d)<\/li>\n
- \u201cWhat circumstances are contributing to the way I\u2019m feeling?\u201d (\u201cStick to the facts: \u2018I\u2019m working 80 hours a week\u2019 or \u2018My partner is saying I\u2019m not doing enough at home.\u2019\u201d)<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n
Next, Dobbin noted that there are two approaches: coping strategies help us to reduce our discomfort in the immediate moment; and a longer-term plan helps us to resolve the root of the stressor. The latter might \u201cinclude having a difficult conversation you\u2019ve been putting off, expressing feelings you\u2019ve been avoiding, or saying no to someone or something that is draining you,\u201d she said.<\/p>\n
The below tried-and-true strategies mainly focus on coping in the immediate moment, along with a tip that addresses successful solutions.<\/p>\n
Recognize old coping strategies (that don\u2019t work). <\/strong>This is crucial in moving forward toward a healthier, more satisfying life. Everyone develops \u201ccoping strategies starting from a very early age that help us \u2018survive,\u2019 whether we experience anything profoundly traumatic or not,\u201d said Erin K. Tierno, a\u00a0licensed clinical social worker and founder of\u00a0Online Therapy NYC<\/a>, where she specializes in helping dynamic, intelligent, driven, busy people to connect in healthier, more fulfilling relationships through online\u00a0therapy.<\/p>\n
\u201cBut often when we reach adulthood we hang on to the same coping strategies we developed earlier in life, even when they don\u2019t suit our current circumstances well.\u201d<\/p>\n
Sometimes, we might not even be aware of these coping strategies. This is when Tierno suggests paying attention to all the behaviors you\u2019re engaging in, and getting curious about how you respond to your feelings.<\/p>\n
She shared this example: You realize you make up excuses to avoid socializing with people you actually like\u2014\u201ca coping strategy that you developed at some earlier point that now just prevents you from having support and feeling connected when you really might need it most.\u201d<\/p>\n
Create a \u201ccoping skill box.\u201d <\/strong>Douglas, founder of Empire Counseling & Consultation<\/a>, suggested filling your coping box with items that help you to feel good, and using them as needed. For instance, she said, you might include Play-Doh, headphones, a journal, and your favorite candy. \u201cMany times, my clients [tell me this] is their little getaway from reality to help them refocus and get back to their responsibilities.\u201d<\/p>\n
Set a dedicated coping session.<\/strong> When coping with a specific, really difficult issue, Tierno recommended scheduling in 30 to 60 minutes a day (or week) to \u201creally go there,\u201d and feel whatever feelings arise. \u201cOutside of that time when painful feelings arise, gently\u2014and kindly\u2014remind yourself that you have a safe and dedicated time for processing those feelings.\u201d<\/p>\n
Modify your schedule. <\/strong>\u201cInstead of jam packing your day with tasks, remove the ones with less importance, and add a coping skill to do instead to increase energy levels and peace,\u201d Douglas said. For instance, instead of running all your errands on the same day after work, split them up, and take that time to take a walk, watch your favorite show, or cook your favorite meal, she said.<\/p>\n
Give yourself breathing room. <\/strong>If you have the financial means, hire a cleaning service to deep-clean your home, drop off your laundry to get washed and folded, or schedule a massage, Tierno said. Another option is to ask loved ones to help out.<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat are some creative ways you can delegate some of your burdensome tasks so that you have a little more breathing room?\u201d Tierno said.<\/p>\n
Do any physical activity.<\/strong> Exercise is a potent stress reliever. According to Douglas, any physical activity\u2014from jumping jacks to squats\u2014can decrease stress. The key is to find ways to move your body that you actually enjoy. So if you don\u2019t enjoy jumping jacks or squats, try something else. Dance. Swim. Buy a hula-hoop or roller-blades. Take an in-person yoga class, or try an online class<\/a>.<\/p>\n
Surround yourself with trees. <\/strong> Because nature can be incredibly soothing, Tierno suggested carving out at least 30 minutes a week to be outside among the trees. \u201cStudies have shown that being near lots of trees significantly reduces blood pressure, anxiety, cortisol levels, and naturally combats depression,\u201d she said.<\/p>\n
Get creative.<\/strong> \u201cSometimes we think our situation is unchangeable when, in fact, there are things we haven\u2019t tried,\u201d Dobbin said. That is, we stop ourselves before we ever start. Instead, channel your creativity into considering a variety of solutions\u2014without discounting them. Make a list of all the possible ways you can resolve a problem. Then consider why you\u2019re tossing these options without even considering them, Dobbin said.<\/p>\n
She gave this example: \u201cIf you feel backed into a corner about attending a family party out of town that you really don\u2019t want to go to, [you] brainstorm ideas like \u2018tell the host that we\u2019ve reconsidered and decided that we can\u2019t make the trip after all,\u2019 \u2018turn it into a longer trip that we will actually enjoy,\u2019 \u2018make a stop on the way out and the way home that will be really fun,\u2019 \u2018call my sister ahead of time and try to resolve that argument from a few months ago so it\u2019s not hanging over my head at the party.\u2019\u201d
\n
\nFocus on kindness.<\/strong> \u201cThe most important healthy coping strategy is really just gentle curiosity and kind self-parenting,\u201d Tierno said. This might look like saying the following to yourself, she said: \u201cHey, self, you\u2019re going through a lot right now, so maybe instead of diving into that [glass] of wine, let\u2019s try a warm bath and going to bed early? Whaddya say?\u201d<\/p>\nIt also might look like gently reflecting on what\u2019s going on\u2014instead of bashing yourself for struggling, or screaming at yourself that you shouldn\u2019t be struggling. Again, you might explore why you\u2019re reacting a certain way, and how your behavior or perspective might be perpetuating the stressful situation\u2014and the changes you can make.<\/p>\n
When stress strikes, it\u2019s important to have a toolbox of strategies you can turn to. Reflect on how you\u2019re currently coping\u2014and whether or not it\u2019s actually supporting your well-being. Add a few tactics and approaches from the above that resonate with you. And regularly re-evaluate them.<\/p>\n
And regularly remind yourself that you are strong enough to weather the storm\u2014no matter the magnitude.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
<\/span><\/div>Visit Original Source<\/a><\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Stress is a big, broad term. It can come in many shapes and stripes. Many of the stressors that Patrice Douglas\u2019s clients experience revolve around work and family. They feel \u201coverwhelmed, unappreciated, and stuck.\u201d Psychotherapist Stephanie Dobbin, LMFT, CGP, works with healthcare professionals, who frequently feel stressed about their jobs: <\/p>\n
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Shared by Margarita Tartakovsky, M.S., Contributing Blogger<\/a> May 6, 2019<\/p>\n<\/span><\/div>","protected":false},"author":1105,"featured_media":7989,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_bbp_topic_count":0,"_bbp_reply_count":0,"_bbp_total_topic_count":0,"_bbp_total_reply_count":0,"_bbp_voice_count":0,"_bbp_anonymous_reply_count":0,"_bbp_topic_count_hidden":0,"_bbp_reply_count_hidden":0,"_bbp_forum_subforum_count":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[5630],"tags":[10105,4144,4138],"class_list":["post-7988","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-clinicians-blog","tag-archive","tag-clinicians-on-the-couch","tag-happiness"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/unitedresourceconnection.org\/goodyear-village-az-cdp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7988","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/unitedresourceconnection.org\/goodyear-village-az-cdp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/unitedresourceconnection.org\/goodyear-village-az-cdp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/unitedresourceconnection.org\/goodyear-village-az-cdp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1105"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/unitedresourceconnection.org\/goodyear-village-az-cdp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=7988"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/unitedresourceconnection.org\/goodyear-village-az-cdp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7988\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/unitedresourceconnection.org\/goodyear-village-az-cdp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/7989"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/unitedresourceconnection.org\/goodyear-village-az-cdp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=7988"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/unitedresourceconnection.org\/goodyear-village-az-cdp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=7988"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/unitedresourceconnection.org\/goodyear-village-az-cdp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=7988"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}