When you take someone’s anger-provoking behavior personally, you feel offended and disrespected. Your reaction to your uncomfortable feelings is either to defend yourself or to submit passively to what the other person seems to think of you. Either way, you view the other person’s behavior as a literal, serious, personal
Read More
Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger March 19, 2019
To sustain an intimate relationship, we must be able to communicate with one another. Our communication needs to go beyond the events of the day to truthful, heartfelt conversation that explores feelings and issues within and affecting the relationship. Much of what passes for communication in daily life is far
Read More Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger March 19, 2019
Anger is an instinctual emotional response from a real or imagined threat. Anger is painful and we need to get relief. We almost always feel something else first before we get angry: afraid, hopeless, hurt, disrespected, disappointed, or guilty. We use anger to protect/cover up these other vulnerable feelings. We
Read More Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger March 19, 2019
Mike and Joan were fighting about the mess in the kitchen. Mike perceived his wife’s criticisms as if they were attacks and he was defending himself against her. Joan felt threatened and was protecting herself against his defenses. She was feeling unappreciated and unloved. They were both repeating the behavior
Read More Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger February 15, 2019
Think of the last time you felt caught up in a distressing emotion. Your body may have felt tense, your mind may have been dwelling on the past or anticipating problems in the future and there is an intensity or urgency in the moment . Many have developed unhealthy strategies
Read More Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger February 15, 2019
Mindfulness is a state of awareness. It is cultivated by systematically focusing attention on bodily sensations, emotions, thoughts, or the surrounding environment. Mindfulness can help you detach from emotional pain (e.g., anxiety, anger, sadness, self-harm). It is basically a way to distract yourself by focusing on something other than the
Read More Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger February 15, 2019
We all have a running inner dialogue of thoughts. Sometime this inner self talk is pessimistic, critical or blaming. By attending to your inner self talk, you will notice critical thoughts intruding, and that’s ok. The aim of a mindful activity is to continually bring your attention back to the
Read More Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger February 15, 2019
I’m proud to announce that the Anger Management Workbook has now sold over 10,000 copies on Amazon. Are you ready to take control of your anger? The Anger Management Workbook for Men goes beyond why men get angry and helps you get to the root of your anger by including: Invaluable information
Read More Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger January 22, 2019
Some of my clients will say to me: “Why do I always end up drinking more than I wanted? I just don’t know.” “I wish I could change how I talk to my partner. We always seem to end up fighting. I just don’t know what to do.” “I can’t
Read More Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger January 16, 2019
Humans are learning machines. From the day we are born and even before, our brains capture and encode our experiences. The mind is a web of connections with over a hundred billion cells that are crammed into three pounds of the most complex tissue in the universe. Our behavior can
Read More Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger January 16, 2019