When we find the causes of our problems, we don’t find “sick” inner parts; we find old assumptions, old beliefs, old expectations, old commitments, or old goals that we now see as limited. We feel excited about finally finding the inner sources of our problems, and we want to change
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Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger January 4, 2020
We are surrounded by material things designed to give us the good life, a life of pleasure. We have medications to relieve the suffering of our aches and pains. It is ironic that we still find ways to suffer, to hide from the possibility of happiness. Our possessions are supposed
Read More Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger December 25, 2019
In the farthest reaches of the desert there was a city in which all the people were blind. A king and his army were passing through that region, and camped outside the city. The king had with him a great elephant, which he used for heavy work and to frighten
Read More Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger December 16, 2019
We all have triggers, blind spots, or vulnerabilities that fuel conflict. The best thing we can do is be aware of them, take responsibility for them, and learn how to work with them effectively. We can’t avoid conflict, but we can learn how to handle it better. Rather than viewing
Read More Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger December 16, 2019
Stereotypically, women are thought of as emotional and men as logical, but biology reveals this is false. Curiously, the inverse in true. Researchers have discovered that men have a larger part of their brain devoted to emotional responses and a smaller region for logical thinking than women. This makes sense
Read More Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger December 12, 2019
An old Cherokee chief is teaching his grandson about life. “A fierce fight is going on inside me.” The chief said to the boy. “It is between two wolves. “One wolf is evil. He is guilt, anger, envy, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, self-doubt and
Read More Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger December 8, 2019
Ann came from a wealthy family in the suburbs. Behind the walls of her expensive home, her stock broker father was an abusive drunk. Her mother was a submissive victim. Her older brother was a sadist and her younger brother was a psychopath. As a child, Ann used her innate
Read More Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger December 3, 2019
It is useful to identify the specific attitudes behind passive aggressive behavior: “I am right and not wrong.” “It’s never my fault.” “I want my way and I have a right to get it!” “It is your responsibility to give me what I want. When you fail, I have the
Read More Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger November 27, 2019
Rejection, it’s what causes so many negative emotions from shyness, to depression, to anger and even despair. Rejection is never easy to accept. In matters of romance, rejection can do even more damage. When you are rejected by someone you deeply want, it can make you feel worthless, unwanted and
Read More Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger November 22, 2019
When you hold on to past hurt, you’re actually trying to relieve your pain by putting other people down and building yourself up. You may imagine that nursing old wounds is the way to be in control and prevent the humiliating exposure of your imperfections. You may even entertain vengeful
Read More Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger November 14, 2019