Emotions are a survival response and cause the human body to trigger the “fight or flight” response. This is a hardwired reaction, in which the body gets literally ready to attack or to flee. Many people label feelings (fear, anger, sadness) as bad or negative states and others (joy, excitement)
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Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger March 7, 2020
Why is it that we fall in love with our dream-mate and then spend the next forty years yelling, fighting and screaming as if we had married our worst enemy? It makes no sense. It makes even less sense to get a divorce and marry someone just like the first
Read More Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger March 7, 2020
Anger is an instinctual emotional response from a real or imagined threat. Anger is painful and we need to get relief. We almost always feel something else first before we get angry: afraid, hopeless, hurt, disrespected, disappointed, or guilty. We use anger to protect/cover up these other vulnerable feelings. We
Read More Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger March 7, 2020
We may feel like we are being helpful by preventing our loved ones from struggling, but we are not allowing them to learn how to effectively manage adversity. To some of us, happiness is useless. Happiness is “easy.” It does not prove that we are “tough,” that we can “take
Read More Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger February 22, 2020
Matt was unhappy with his job. He became an accountant because he thought it would please his parents and that it would prove that he was better than what they though he was. His oldest brother had been divorced three times; his middle brother has been out of work for
Read More Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger February 12, 2020
Most of us spend a lot of time criticizing ourselves. For example, if the thought comes up ‘I’m so ugly’, and we dwell on all the moments we felt unattractive, it gains power. When we stew, chew or brood, we are investing more energy in a thought and in turn
Read More Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger February 10, 2020
Jerome wanted to know why he still felt so badly about his parents’ divorce. He couldn’t understand it. He was ten years old at the time. He came to counseling to begin his search for the answer. Therapist: “What is the worst thing about your parents’ divorce?” Jerome: “It feels
Read More Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger February 4, 2020
Dr. Aimee Daramus shares her insight and expertise in this guest blog about managing emotions when someone you care about has a mental illness. When you have a loved one with a mental illness, you’re going to have a lot of thoughts and feelings, and you may not feel that
Read More Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger January 30, 2020
Here are five reasons to why couples should seek counseling: 1) Strengthen Communication Skills: Being able to effectively listen, truly hear and validate the other’s position is a skill that isn’t necessarily a “given” for many people. Couples that really communicate effectively can discuss and resolve issues when they arise
Read More Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger January 30, 2020
We spend much of our lives asking the wrong questions and complaining we can’t get a straight answer. For example, “Why are you so stupid?” or “How can I get him to change?” These questions are “wrong” because they miss the point, they are counter-productive, and they make the problem
Read More Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger January 30, 2020