Help littles manage big feelings during the holidays

The winter holiday season can be stressful as well as joyful for both adults and children. The entire family can become overstimulated and exhausted with multiple family and community celebration events, many of which encourage overspending and overeating refined carbohydrates. It’s also a time when nostalgia for times and people past can trigger grief.

The season can also be an excellent opportunity for parents to teach and model healthy self-care practices so that the entire family can stress less and enjoy truly peaceful and positive experiences.

Kayla Craig is a writer, podcaster, author. and mother of four. According to her website (kaylacraig.com/), she very much understands the joys and heartaches that come with raising compassionate, connected kids in a complicated world.

Craig says, “… All of us, from kids to grown-ups, need to have the right habits in place that allow us to take a break and decompress. …Creating these healthy habits at a young age empowers kids to be resilient in all that life brings. What a gift to give your kids!” She adds, “…establishing healthy self-care activities for kids doesn’t have to be complicated — and it can be a lot of fun!”

Craig offers the following easy strategies to teach children how to practice self-care and reduce stress any time of the year:

~ Take belly breaths. When you sense that your child needs a break, pretend that you’re holding a bowl of soup. Ask them to breathe in through their nose like they’re smelling a yummy soup, and then ask them to blow through their mouth to cool the soup off. Sometimes, my kids pretend that they’re breathing in the smell of a delicious cake and then blowing out birthday candles. This self-regulation strategy is something they can do on their own, wherever they are.

~ Get silly. When a child is having a tough time or cycling through big emotions, I ask silly questions to help them reset. Asking a concrete question they know the answer to helps re-route their thinking. Ask questions like: What color is the sky? What did you have for breakfast? Where is your shoe? Even if they answer incorrectly, you’re helping their brain and body calm down. Teach your child that when they have big feelings, they can pay attention to the room around them and name five things they see as a way to “reset” their brains.

~ Drink more water. Empowering kids to stay hydrated is a simple way to teach them a self-care habit to last a lifetime. If they’re tall enough, encourage them to refill their own water bottles — this gives them a sense of independence. Self-care for kids is about helping them find quiet moments to take a break and reset after stressful situations or big emotions.

~ Be proactive. When I start to see signs that one of my kids might be stressed, or I know there is a big change coming, or if they’ve had a particularly challenging day, I give them a special mission to complete. Perhaps it’s cleaning up the blocks for a younger child or asking an older child to carry books into another room. This helps them see that it’s okay to take a break — and in fact, getting their bodies moving is a form of self-care. Slightly older kids may find a good reset in helping feed a pet or get the mail.

~ Incorporate rest. Every child needs time to rest on their own. Think about your child’s unique personality, age, and interest to help them create small pockets of rest in their daily routine. Perhaps it’s a time with books in their bedroom, or a ten-minute coloring break at the kitchen table.

~ Get the wiggles out. Sometimes we just need to move our bodies. Not only does it get our blood pumping, but it can be a great mood balancer, too. Try a one-minute dance break or challenge your child to 15 jumping jacks. Doing something physical and involving brings them back into their bodies and the present moment.

~ Write (or color) it out. Give older kids a journal to write in or provide a drawing pad to younger children. Dedicating time (We’re going to spend 10 minutes taking a break to draw or write!) and space (like the kitchen table) shows kids that getting our thoughts and feelings out matters. Providing prompts (“When your brother knocked down your tower, how did that make you feel? What was the happiest part of your day?”) helps them stay focused. Freewriting and drawing without any constraints is a wonderful self-care activity for kids and grown-ups alike.

~ Take a break. Simply asking, “Do you need to take a break?” Or saying, “Let’s take a break!,” when I notice a child having a hard time has done wonders. … Try to normalize taking breaks as a way to keep ourselves healthy. Having a designated break spot to go to is helpful. And as they get older, the goal is that they’ll be able to name when they need to take a break.

~ Have a healthy snack. If your child is feeling a little “hangry” (hungry and angry), encourage them to recognize and name this sensation. Then suggest a nutritious nibble. We opt for grab-and-go snacks that have protein, like cheese sticks, nuts, greek yogurt, hard-boiled eggs, or crackers with peanut butter.

~ Get clean. An impromptu bath can provide rest for young and old alike. Preschoolers may like extra bubbles, a bath bomb, bath crayons or paints, or extra toys. Older elementary-age kids sometimes love to reset with a hot shower.

~ Try affirmations. Breathe in and breathe out a positive phrase. When your child breathes in, have them repeat something like “I am creative and kind.” On their exhale, they can say, “I can make good decisions.” Have them repeat this a few times. If a child is feeling anxious about going to school, create an easy phrase they can silently recite as they breathe in and out, like: “Learning is fun,” or “my parents will pick me up soon.” Older children can brainstorm their own self-care affirmations to memorize or write on a sticky note and place somewhere they can take a break to read it, like on a bathroom mirror or bedroom door.

Visit www.pbs.org/parents/healthy-me for more of Kayla Craig’s healthy habits activities, recipes, and games or go to kaylacraig.com/ to subscribe to her free newsletter for parents.

(Contact Grace Terry at grace@angelsabide.com)

The post Help littles manage big feelings during the holidays first appeared on Native Sun News Today.

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