Anger is an instinctual emotional response from a real or imagined threat. Anger is painful and we need to get relief. We almost always feel something else first before we get angry: afraid, hopeless, hurt, disrespected, disappointed, or guilty. We use anger to protect/cover up these other vulnerable feelings. We
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Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger March 7, 2020
Why is it that we fall in love with our dream-mate and then spend the next forty years yelling, fighting and screaming as if we had married our worst enemy? It makes no sense. It makes even less sense to get a divorce and marry someone just like the first
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Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger March 7, 2020
When we find the causes of our problems, we don’t find “sick” inner parts; we find old assumptions, old beliefs, old expectations, old commitments, or old goals that we now see as limited. We feel excited about finally finding the inner sources of our problems, and we want to change
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Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger February 13, 2020
Everyone tells new parents how hard it’s going to be. But you can’t really know till you’re there yourself, sleep deprived, wanting to do your best at this very important job, and always feeling overwhelmed by the demands. This is an especially hard time for couples. A lot of people
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Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger February 13, 2020
Our problems with guilt, often have two components: the current triggering “offense,” and our underlying, residual feelings from the past. When something in the present reminds us of a similar feeling from the past, they combine to make us feel guiltier than we need to feel. This excessive guilt can
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Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger February 13, 2020
Dr. Aimee Daramus shares her insight and expertise in this guest blog about managing emotions when someone you care about has a mental illness. When you have a loved one with a mental illness, you’re going to have a lot of thoughts and feelings, and you may not feel that
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Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger February 13, 2020
Here are five reasons to why couples should seek counseling: 1) Strengthen Communication Skills: Being able to effectively listen, truly hear and validate the other’s position is a skill that isn’t necessarily a “given” for many people. Couples that really communicate effectively can discuss and resolve issues when they arise
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Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger February 13, 2020
We spend much of our lives asking the wrong questions and complaining we can’t get a straight answer. For example, “Why are you so stupid?” or “How can I get him to change?” These questions are “wrong” because they miss the point, they are counter-productive, and they make the problem
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Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger February 13, 2020
Why do some children lash out? Why do they throw things around the room, yell at the people they love and smack those who they rely on? Most parents feel inadequately prepared to cope with anger problems because they never had anger management training. They hate it. They are afraid
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Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger February 13, 2020
Jerome wanted to know why he still felt so badly about his parents’ divorce. He couldn’t understand it. He was ten years old at the time. He came to counseling to begin his search for the answer. Therapist: “What is the worst thing about your parents’ divorce?” Jerome: “It feels
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Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger February 13, 2020