Let me tell you about Mr. and Mrs. R, a couple I recently saw in my office. When they came in, they recounted an argument they’d had the previous Friday. They’d started the day in bed, cuddling and snuggling affectionately. But then Mr. R felt his wife resisting. He snapped
Read More
Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger December 11, 2019
When you hold on to past hurt, you’re actually trying to relieve your pain by putting other people down and building yourself up. You may imagine that nursing old wounds is the way to be in control and prevent the humiliating exposure of your imperfections. You may even entertain vengeful
Read More Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger December 11, 2019
Rejection, it’s what causes so many negative emotions from shyness, to depression, to anger and even despair. Rejection is never easy to accept. In matters of romance, rejection can do even more damage. When you are rejected by someone you deeply want, it can make you feel worthless, unwanted and
Read More Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger December 11, 2019
Anger is a healthy emotion in everybody’s life — when it’s expressed in an appropriate manner at the right time. Anger can help to energize and motivate us to work to address problems with another person or to change our life situation. However, there are potential negative consequences of anger when
Read More Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger December 11, 2019
It is useful to identify the specific attitudes behind passive aggressive behavior: “I am right and not wrong.” “It’s never my fault.” “I want my way and I have a right to get it!” “It is your responsibility to give me what I want. When you fail, I have the
Read More Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger December 11, 2019
Ann came from a wealthy family in the suburbs. Behind the walls of her expensive home, her stock broker father was an abusive drunk. Her mother was a submissive victim. Her older brother was a sadist and her younger brother was a psychopath. As a child, Ann used her innate
Read More Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger December 11, 2019
An old Cherokee chief is teaching his grandson about life. “A fierce fight is going on inside me.” The chief said to the boy. “It is between two wolves. “One wolf is evil. He is guilt, anger, envy, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, self-doubt and
Read More Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger December 11, 2019
Anger is like fire: it cannot survive without fuel. Like fire, unchecked anger can grow out of control and cause enormous damage and pain. But also like fire, anger can be recognized, controlled and managed in our lives. The fuel that keeps anger burning can come from many sources –
Read More Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger August 14, 2019
I had a client named Jack, who couldn’t see why he shouldn’t be “hard” on his wife and kids. It was for their own good. “I’m no harder on them than I am on myself,” he would say. In reality, no good could come of his critical and blaming approach to
Read More Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger August 8, 2019
The Secret Service’s National Threat Assessment Center, examined 28 mass shootings, which claimed nearly 150 lives and wounded hundreds. Between January and December 2017, 28 incidents of mass shootings, during which three or more persons were harmed, were carried out in public places within the United States. The assessment discovered
Read More Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger August 8, 2019