Stanislaus County Social Service News


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The Logic Of Guilt

Some of us feel terribly out of control when others are unable to “explain” events to our satisfaction.  When we are unable to come up with an acceptable solution to a problem, we are often left focusing on who is at fault.  It is like having an open wound.  It

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Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger June 27, 2018

Seeking Perfection: Proving Superiority

When we feel badly about ourselves, we may imagine that we can relieve our pain by “proving” that we are superior. This is called overcompensation. The trouble is that it doesn’t work. We all want to be better than we are. We want to be smarter, happier, thinner, richer, wittier,

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Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger June 27, 2018

Remorse is the Opposite of Blame

Some people deal with their guilt by blaming others.  We may deny our guilt because, very often, we are so full of guilt from the past that we cannot tolerate the addition of one more ounce in the present.  We may be afraid that we will lash out, breakdown, or

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Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger June 27, 2018

If You’re So Smart, Why Aren’t You Happy?

For some of us, happiness is not a given. We have to earn it. We have to work and struggle to prove we deserve it. Too many of us are working at it in an unhealthy way and wondering why our happiness is getting farther away instead of closer.  The

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Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger June 27, 2018

Anxiety: We Worry Because We Care

Anxiety is a completely normal physical response to protect ourself against a threat.  It’s not ‘crazy’, ‘bitchy’, or controlling, and it is not a weakness to worry. There is a primitive part of the brain that’s geared toward driving our attention to threats. When it does, the body surges with

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Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger June 27, 2018

Taking Control: Part 1

Henry had come to town to be with his father, who was in failing health.  He thought he’d stay a week or two and then return home.  However, his father began opening up and engaging in deeper talks, something Henry never had when he was younger. Henry was getting insight

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Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger June 27, 2018

Taking Control: Part 2

Henry realized that he had not been in control all these years as he thought, he was just playing roles, wasting his life seeking approval.   The game of tug-o-war was over, he was not going to pick up the rope and get dragged through the mud. Henry dropped the

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Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger June 27, 2018

Don’t Take The Last Run: Advice From My Father

My sister and me in Taos, New Mexico, circa 1984. Look how happy we are. I think it’s because we didn’t take the last run. Ahem. Father’s Day is coming up this weekend, which has got me thinking about my Dad. He gave me a lot of advice over the

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Shared by Carla Naumburg, Ph.D, Contributing Blogger June 14, 2018

How to Find the Right ADHD Coach for You

When you have ADHD you can easily feel overwhelmed and paralyzed. You may have a hard time with everything from prioritizing tasks to completing projects to managing your time to organizing your home. You also procrastinate. You’re constantly running late. Planning makes you break out in hives (figuratively). You feel

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Shared by Margarita Tartakovsky, M.S., Contributing Blogger June 2, 2018

Maintaining a Healthy Relationship When Your Partner Has Bipolar Disorder

Bipolar disorder is a difficult, complicated illness. And like any illness, it can naturally spill over into your relationship. As couples therapist Julia Nowland noted, “Bipolar disorder can be an emotional roller-coaster ride for the couple, with many ups and downs that mimic the disorder itself.” But this doesn’t mean

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Shared by Margarita Tartakovsky, M.S., Contributing Blogger May 28, 2018